27/09/2018

Baby on board

No, do not panic, I am most definitely not pregnant again.

Definitely not. No thanks. Not yet.


No, in fact, this is a post about things I never even realised were proper 'things' before having a baby.

The first of which is a baby on board sign. Of course, I've seen many cars on the road with these stuck in their rear window and I've always wondered the same thing: "Why on earth are they telling me there's a baby on board? What do they want me to do? Is it like those signs on vans that say they don't leave tools in overnight? Is the baby not left in overnight?"

I never could understand the point of them. That is, until, I had a baby myself. Nothing makes my blood run colder than some dickhead driver on the road when I have Peyton in the car. I absolutely hate it.


So many times since she has been born we have come across idiots who have almost crashed into the side of us, wiped us out on a roundabout and pulled out on us at junctions.

"We need a baby on board sign so people realise we've a baby in here and stop driving like twats," Tom says each time.

But will it really work? Or will people just have the same thought process as me?


After some persuasion, I conceded to the sun visors on the windows in the back of the car. Now, when I see cars with these, I know they're there because there's a baby in the car. Maybe it's just part of an unwritten parenting code?

We still haven't got a 'baby on board' sign, though. I'm still holding out on that one.

Another thing I didn't realise the point of, which my best friend also brought up this week, was those morons who go to the Next sale at like 5am on a Saturday morning.

"Why? Why? Whyyyy?"

I used to think.

"Why would anyone want to get up so early to just go look at some clothes in the sale?"



Now I have a Next account, I get an email every time the sale comes around to 'book my VIP slot online'. It's the step before getting up at cock o'clock to go shopping in, what is essentially, the middle of the night. But I've still done it. I've booked my slot and stocked up on the next size of clothes, or clothes for next summer that we loved this year, at a fraction of the price.

It all makes so much sense now and I am so sorry to all those mums who I used to think were morons.

Isn't it so weird how your entire outlook on absolutely everything changes when you have a baby. Your whole life gets swallowed up by this tiny little bundle and everything you thought you knew suddenly changes. Your new normal is something you don't even recognise and you suddenly find yourself doing things you always swore you would never. I am definitely guilty of that. If you follow me on Instagram, you'll know I'm a big baby spammer.


I'd said before she was born that I wouldn't, but I just can't help myself. I like to be an active Instagrammer, especially on the days when I'm home all day or don't really see anyone, because it makes me feel like I am having some communication with the outside world. I'm not mad, I swear.

I like posting the highs, the lows, the funny times, and the sad times. It's nice to keep a record of everything we've done and I can't wait till she's a bit older and I can show her all the things she used to get up to as a baby - poonamis and all!


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