Saturday, 20 September 2014

45 thoughts had by girls while getting ready for a night out

When getting ready for a night out, every girl has a routine which she follows while getting ready.  It's the same every time - the same questions, the same dramas and the same thoughts.



1. Is this going to be a heels night out or not?



2. What time will I need to start getting ready if I have to wash my hair?



3. Is this going to be a night worthy of shaving my legs for?



4. Why can I never find any kirby grips?



5. I think I'm going to wear my new heels.



6. Oh, but they're peep toe, that means I need to paint my toe nails.



7. I want to wear my cream skorts but that means I will need to fake tan.



8. Do I have time to fake tan?



9. Am I going to need to undergo a course of hair removal before tonight?



10. I don't want to pull, so I'm not going to shave.



11. What time shall we start pre-drinking?



12. I better not drink too much before I have done my eye make-up.



13. I don't know what to wear.



14. I'm just going to straighten my hair.


15. I am getting really good at this tanning my back/flexibility thing.


16. My hair looks flat, I wonder if I've got any dry shampoo.


17. Why can't I do smoky eyes without looking like I've been punched?


18. I'll try back-combing my hair.


19. Did I have pictures taken last time I wore this or can I wear it again?


20. Shall I wear the skorts or trousers?


21. If I wear the skorts, I can't wear my new top.


22. If I wear the trousers I'll have to wear the strappy heels that hurt my feet.


23. Mabye I'll just wear a dress.


24. I wonder what I can eat when I get home.


25. I'm just going to have to put my hair up.


26. Why does my forehead look so big?


27. Have I drawn my eyebrows on evenly?


28. I need more wine.


29. I still don't know what I am wearing.


30. I'll just take a selfie 'so I can see what my make-up looks like'


31. I look great *uploads to Instagram and Facebook*


32. #selfie #drunk #girl #fridaynight #woo #goingout #blonde #brunette #babe #happy #redlips #smokyeyes #party #brows #me #love #excited


33. I hope I've used enough hashtags.


34. The taxi is coming in two hours - I'm not dressed or drunk.


35. I'm not going to drunk text anyone tonight.


36. I don't like how I've done my hair.


37. I'm just going to wear the skorts.


38. Do I look like I've got man legs?


39. Maybe I should wear the trousers.


40. Screw it, I'm wearing a playsuit.


41. I best not break the seal before I put it on.


42. I need more wine.


43. Taxi will be here in ten minutes, have I got my lippy in my bag?


44. Shit, haven't got my keys or my ID.


45. I'm finally ready, let's go!


Thursday, 4 September 2014

Why 'don't send naked photos to someone if you don't want them online' wins ridiculous argument of the week

'Don't send naked photos to someone if you don't want them online' is an argument I have seen a lot this week after naked photos of some high profile, female celebrities were posted online and shared by millions.

In my opinion, that argument is right up there with the ridiculous 'she was wearing a short skirt so she was asking for it' statement.  That is never, ever an ok argument.

For a woman to share intimate photos with a man is a big deal, and there has to be a lot of trust there.  To those in a relationship, I imagine swapping the odd saucy picture now and again is commonplace.  But what happens when the relationship ends or goes sour?

Of course, taking such photos and sharing them with someone else opens you up to an element of risk and with 'revenge porn' on the rise, sending intimate photos to someone is more dangerous than ever.

The internet, social media and technology are constantly evolving and developing and 'revenge porn' is changing right with it, becoming an increasingly big problem.

Some websites have even been created with the sole purpose of uploading 'revenge porn' pictures, often with the pictures linked to the victims' social media accounts and sometimes even including their full name and personal details such as their address.

The first rule of sending a saucy, naked photo is to cut your face out - everyone knows (or at least should know) that.

But this apparently foolproof rule doesn't save you from the shame of  'revenge porn'.   Most of these sites include intimate, personal photos of women with fully clothed, full-length images of the victims right next to them.  Distinguishing features such as the same bedroom decor, the same mirror, the same hair colour or the same freckle are all pointed out - these people are hell-bent on making sure their victim is totally humiliated and known to all.

Of course, there is nothing to stop these people matching 'headless' naked bodies with fully-clothed pictures, claiming that it is the same person - these horrible people will try anything to shame someone.

Women in the UK have reportedly been forced to shell out hundreds of pounds to remove their images from sites such as these, some of which are porn sites based in the United States.

The consequences of falling victim to an incident like this can be life-changing.  Women have committed suicide after their nude photos were shared on social networking sites; careers can be ruined forever; and relationships pushed to breaking point.

Next month, a proposed change to the law could stop these personal photos being shared online and used as 'revenge porn' once the relationship ends.  Unfortunately, technology is advancing so quickly that there are worries this will be too difficult to police and enforce.

To say that someone shouldn't send naked photos to someone if they don't want them online is stupid.  The only reason most women would send such photos to a guy is if they trusted them and, in most cases, loved them.

Opening up to someone and having that intimate relationship is something that should remain between two people, whether the relationship ends in a bad way or not.  No woman deserves to be treated like that, especially not by someone she once trusted enough to have such photos of her in the first place.

60 things you'll hear when you live with girls

Whether you live in an all-girl household or its mixed, when females live in close proximity with each other for anything length of time, you are bound to hear some of the following phrases/questions/statements uttered on a regular basis:

1. "Has anyone got any kirby grips?"

2. "How should I have my hair tonight?"

3. "Is this going to be a 'heels' night out?"

4. "Can I get in the shower first or do you want to get in?"

5. "Are you wearing that dress I borrowed once before?" *No* "Oooh, can I borrow it then please?"

6. "Can I use someone's hairspray?"

7. "Has anyone got any dry shampoo?"

8. "Did you know Ben & Jerry's is on offer at Morrisons?"

9. "Did someone lock the door?"

10. "Shall we order cookie dough?"

11. *Lying in bed, hear a man's voice in the house* "WHO'S THAT?!" *Promptly texts all occupants*

12. "David Beckham, though"

13. "Should I get a fringe?"

14. "Those are man's shoes...who has a man in the house?!"

15. "I need to do a wash, I've only got my 'period pants' left"

16. "What nights are we going out this week?"

17. "Taxi will be here in ten minutes - has everyone got their bags and had a wee?"

18. "I've not eaten anything yet today"

19. "I can't stop eating today"

20. "I need to go to the library this weekend" *Spends the entire weekend in bed watching Revenge*

21. "Can I get away with not wearing a bra?"

22. "David Beckham, though"

23. "I haven't shaved my legs for weeks"

24. "I bet my legs are hairier than yours"

25. "I'd better start getting ready now because I need to wash my hair"

26. "Anyone want to go get cake?"

27. "One more episode, then I'll get ready"

28. "Is he fit?"

29. "Does he have any fit brothes?"

30. "I'm really bloated"

31. "I'm going to do my washing today" *Cue every available surface area covered in clothes and underwear*

32. "When I get married..."

33. "I need a big poo before I can wear that"

34. "Our bathroom is disgusting" *Nobody does anything about it*

35. "Let's watch The Notebook"

36. "That's just like that time in Friends when..."

37. "Does anyone have an eye liner sharpener?"

38. "Have you got any spray?"

39. "Will you tan my back please?"

40. "Can you tell I'm not wearing any pants?"

41. "Today is a fat day"

42. "I'm not going out this week, I have no money and loads of work on" *Wakes up the next morning in a pool of self-loathing and shame with the hangover to end all hangovers*

43. "David Beckham, though"

44. "It's ok, I only need a body shower"

45. "He was a dick anyway"

46. "Is it too early for wine?" *Never*

47. "Why don't we look like Michelle Keegan?"

48. "I think I'm pregnant"

49. "She looks so much better in that than me, I'm going to the gym tomorrow."

50. "I can't be bothered going to the gym, wanna get a Chinese?"

51. "Frizz is an issue today"

52. "I wish McDonald's had no calories in"

53. "Have you seen his new girlfriend?!"

54. "Let's Facebook stalk her"

55. "You're a million times better than her"

56. "Let's get wine"

57. "I think I have another stretch mark"

58. "What is my hair doing?"

59. "Which Instagam filter shall we use?  I like Valenica."

60. *After a few glasses of wine* "I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!!!"

Being a girl and living with girls is the best, isn't it?!