Why do people think it's ok to be a dick to others?

Why do people think it's ok to be a dick to others? I really wish I knew.

Putting yourself out there on social media, in today's society, is a risk. You open yourself up to scrutiny, criticism and bullying - and that's not ok.

Social media, when used properly, can be an amazing thing. It raises awareness of campaigns and good causes, helps to find lost people/pets, and raises money for vital fundraisers. However, the minority ruin it for everyone else by using it as a way to bully others.

Just because someone is in the public eye, or because their profile is open to public viewing, does not mean that we know every single detail about their life. It is not an invitation to pass judgement or to be mean.

It is possible, believe it or not, to see something (or someone) that you don't like on your news feed and keep on scrolling. If you passed someone in the street and didn't like their outfit, or their hair, or their glasses, you wouldn't stop and tell them. So why is it ok to do it from behind a keyboard?

Why is it ok to bully someone? And do so in such a faceless way.

It's cowardly behaviour.

It’s 2020, yet STILL people take every word in the tabloids as gospel. They eat into the clickbait culture and hound people when they’re at their absolute lowest ebb. 

Trolls - who aren’t even brave enough to use their own names/accounts - BULLY people online relentlessly; just because they can.

The media feeds this vile culture. You only have to look at the comments section on Mail Online to see a fraction of some of the disgusting, unthinkable abuse people are subject to. That’s just a tiny proportion of it.

The media decided Caroline Flack was guilty of assaulting her boyfriend before Christmas. Despite the fact she appeared before court and entered a NOT GUILTY plea. Her boyfriend also vehemently denied that anything happened. Yet they continued - ripping into her at every available opportunity; fuelling those evil keyboard warriors to do the same.

Nobody knows what anybody is going through behind closed doors and it absolutely breaks my heart that there are people out there who are so unhappy with their lives that they see no other option but suicide. I’ve seen nothing but an outpouring of love since the news broke of her passing. 

No doubt if she’d known how many people loved her, she might have taken a different course of action. Instead, the trolls won. The hate - once again - overpowered the amount of love. Why?! Why can’t people just be nice??

We’re on a vicious cycle where someone high profile takes their own life, everyone says we need to be kinder, but it’s all forgotten when the next “scandal” knocks on the door of the press and another person’s life is left in tatters.

My heart breaks for Caroline Flack’s family and friends. And the family and friends of anyone else who has ever lost someone because of suicide.

People calling for Love Island to be banned as a result of her suicide are only serving to add to the problem. The problem is not Love Island.

In fact, the people that are in South Africa appearing on the show at the moment are probably in one of the best situations. No phones, no access to the outside world, no access to social media, and no way of seeing the poison that’s been written.

The headlines “game” last week showed just how damaging they can be, when the couples got upset about things written about them that weren’t true.

The problem here is not the show. The show is called Love Island, not Troll Island. It’s about love. It’s about friendship.

It all goes wrong when they enter the real world which, unfortunately, doesn’t seem to be as focused on love, kindness and friendship.

Taking Love Island off our screens won't fix this problem.

There needs to be tighter regulations on social media. And tighter regulations on how the tabloids operate. IPSO is there to regulate the media, but I feel they have some work to do when it comes to bullying people via the press.

They need to rein in their hateful articles, but maybe stop allowing people to comment. The comments section on Mail Online is like some cesspool for trolls. It’s vile.

I don’t know what it is about the internet that makes people think that they can say whatever they want about a person. I used to hate it when Tom had to do Facebook live videos for work because every time, without fail, the comments would be SO personal about him. Even on articles that he’d written, they’d write horrible, horrible things. He was never bothered by it, but it always upset me.

These nobs have no conscience and no concept of how their words affect not only the person they’re aimed at, but their family and friends, too.

None of this is caused by a TV show that’s about love.

It’s caused by a society that suddenly thinks it’s okay to be dicks to people for no other reason than you don’t like/agree with them.

And until that underlying issue is fixed, nothing else will be.

It scares me, the way the world is going. We can protect our children from almost anything. We can vaccinate them against diseases, keep them safe in the car, hold their hands when walking down the street, teach them about stranger danger, teach them to swim, teach them to ride a bike without stabilisers... but we can’t protect them from themselves and their thoughts. And we certainly can’t protect them from vile, horrible trolls who will beat them down quicker than they can ever get back up.

The world is a dark, dark place at times; and right now feels like one of them. I hope, finally, this is the catalyst for change.

No more lives should be lost this way. Please, just be kind to everyone.

The age for free childcare hours needs re-assessing

I saw a petition shared on Facebook yesterday. This isn't uncommon, I often see all sorts of petitions shared: boycott this, change that, implement this... I rarely pay much attention.

However, this one caught my eye. And I signed it. And now I'm going to rant about it.

It was a petition to the government to give 15 hours free childcare to working parents of children from the age of nine months.

After nine months of maternity leave, most mums stop getting maternity pay (unless you work for a company that has a banging maternity scheme - if that's you, I'm really jealous).

I got statutory maternity pay when I was off which meant that when my nine months of leave were up, the £130-odd a week I got paid would stop. I was entitled to take a full 12 months of maternity leave, however the last quarter would be unpaid.

We, obviously, could not afford this. We saved enough to supplement the poor statutory maternity pay each month for the nine months I was off, but would've struggled to go any longer.

I've come back to work full-time, because I couldn't afford not to.

It's a double-edged sword.

Peyton goes to nursery three days a week because we couldn't manage grandparent childcare for those days. Even if we could, I'd have still sent her one day a week so she got to do all the fun/messy things I don't want to do at home (and obvs for the social interaction/development etc, too). Just for three days a week, our bill for nursery last month was more than our mortgage. And will be every month.

Granted, I do the tax-free childcare government scheme which pays 20% of your bill; so I saved about £100 off it. But still, it's a huge chunk of my wage gone.

**If you don't do this, you really need to! It's really easy to sign up to. Once you're done, all you do is pay 80% of your bill onto this government portal, they top it up with the further 20%, and then you send the payment to your nursery. It'll save us just over £1,000 a year which is better than a slap in the face.**

I can't go part-time because the days I would work would be the three we have no alternative childcare and she goes to nursery. So I'd be on a reduced wage, still paying out the hefty bill every month.

It's absolutely ludicrous that parents are faced with this expense - as if it wasn't expensive enough having a child!

Peyton loves nursery, so it's money well spent, but a helping hand from the government in terms of free hours would go a long way. Fifteen hours is not even two full days, it's not a lot, but it would be a huge help. Particularly to parents who are even less fortunate than us and don't have any childcare help and require full-time nursery places.

It would mean mums - and dads - could go back to work with more ease; it would encourage more parents to go back to work rather than to quit their jobs because, in so many cases, it costs too much to work.

How crazy is that?! It costs us too much money to work.

I'll get a certain amount of free hours when she turns two, I think, but even then that doesn't start until the start of the next term; meaning they'll kick in next September!

Fifteen hours a week from nine months for working parents would make the biggest of differences. In a country where employment rates aren't the greatest, surely the government should be doing everything it can to encourage people to get (back) into work. This would go such a long way to that.

Of course, there are parents who don't want to go back to work once their baby has been born. So not every single parent would claim the free hours. Some, even if they are going back to work, might still favour grandparent childcare to nurseries so they wouldn't require it either.

It's hard enough going back to work after having a baby without facing the prospect of steep childcare  costs (which are totally and utterly warranted, by the way, because the staff at nurseries do an amazing job and deal with an awful lot of shit; quite literally!!)

This petition is probably going to make no difference whatsoever. Parliament is so busy dealing with/arguing over Brexit it doesn't seem that anything else gets done at the moment.

Even if Brexit wasn't occupying so much of our politicians' time, I still highly doubt they would listen to the thousands who are crying out for the change. These petitions pop up all the time and the success rate is depressingly low.

But, I suppose, if you don't ask you don't get. I might write to my MP and see if it is something that could be raised in Parliament; often a quite email/letter to them gets things brought up at least in PMQs (Prime Minister's questions) and noted on record more than these petitions do.

If you want to sign the petition, which as I write this is still climbing, the link is here.

When I saw it yesterday it was on 18,000 signatures - it's now over 66,000 less than 24 hours later.

It's unlikely it'll make a difference, but we can but try!

Pain relief or not, we should be proud of every woman who gives birth

There's been a big debate this week (when isn't there?!) after Harry Kane tweeted about the arrival of his new baby girl.

Photo from @HKane on Twitter.

Quite innocently, and rightly so, Harry tweeted the message saying how proud he was of his fiancée for bringing their new baby daughter into the world. It was the last bit that seems to have got everyone's back up.

"So proud of you @KateGoodlandx for having the most amazing water birth with no pain relief at all."

Dun dun dunnnnnn.

Yes, apparently the society that we live in today means that everyone is so easily offended by everything, that Harry Kane is now in the wrong for being proud of his amazing baby mama.

WHO'D HAVE THOUGHT!!!

Apparently, by expressing his pride, Harry Kane was 'shaming' those who use pain relief during labour. I know, I had to read between the lines an awful lot to get that, too.

He was then forced to defend himself, after receiving so much backlash, and reassured the easily offended that "women can give birth however they would like" explaining how they had done hypnobirthing.

Can we just take a second, though, to notice the best thing about this tweet? The fact that it looks like our England captain is sporting a very sexy grey nightie. 

Hypnobirthing, as I've previously said, teaches you to keep calm and relaxed throughout your labour. It reminds you that your body is capable of more than you realise and puts you in a positive state of mind about your labour, removing that element of fear and the 'fight or flight' response.

Hypnobirthing works as well as your labour lets it. I know people who have practiced hypnobirthing throughout their pregnancy but their labours haven't been straightforward and have meant it's not been as effective.

For me, it worked like a dream. I had a bit of gas and air while in the pool when my contractions started coming thick and fast, but soon had to give it up soon after as I couldn't focus on my breathing while inhaling the gas and air.

Having a lovely time in the birth pool with my LED tea lights and my deep breathing.

Other than that, I had no pain relief at all. When it came to pushing her out, I did it all by myself - focusing on my breathing and keeping a calm, relaxed, positive mindset; even when things started to go wrong.

I was so proud of myself for managing to put into practice everything we learnt. I was proud of being able to channel that positivity and not let myself be scared or worried about what was happening.

But just because I was proud of myself for doing it without any pain relief, and for being able to put into practice everything we learnt during our hypnobirthing classes, doesn't mean that women who opt for pain relief shouldn't be proud, too.

It doesn't mean that women who have to have emergency caesareans shouldn't be proud. Or those who opt for elective caesareans.

Every single woman who brings a child into this world should be proud, and their partners should share that pride. Childbirth, whether natural or not, is bloody hard work.

Pregnancy is hard work, too. Our bodies go through the biggest change in such a short time - I've talked openly with how I struggled with that. Just as I am struggling with getting used to my post-baby body. Our personalities change as the hormones begin to rage; we start to dislike foods, drinks and smells that we previously loved; we swell; we cry... It's just such a glam time...!

So after going through all of that, to bring a baby into this world is something to be shouted about. It doesn't matter how that little bundle of joy enters the world - whether it's in the water, on the bed, on a stool, via surgery, or in the back of a car - the woman who birthed them is amazing.

Our bodies can do incredible things - women are incredible.

Nobody should bash anybody for how they decide to birth their child. Everyone should be rewarded and praised for doing it at all.

Shout it from the rooftops, take a full page ad in your local paper, let everyone know that you survived nine months of pregnancy and birthing the child at the end.

Women are judged enough in this life for every decision they make as a mother. Whether it's the breastfeeding vs formula debate, the dummy brigade or those who judge you for not co-sleeping with your little one, everyone has an opinion.

Nobody should feel judged in their role as a mum. Every child is different - what works for one won't work for another. I hate this society we live in where the media make everything into a competition between people. They make us judge each other without us even realising and that's not on.

Like Mean Girls says: "I wish that I could bake a cake made out of rainbows and smiles and we'd all eat it and be happy".

It's time everyone was kinder to each other, and I really wish the media would start setting a better example of that.

"There is no force more powerful than a woman determined to rise"

"To tell a woman everything she cannot do is to tell her what she can."

When I was at primary school, I remember vividly always wanting to be good at everything. I was on the top table for Maths and English, and I always wanted to do well in every test, challenge and activity that I was set.

Maths was always my weakest subject, and always the one I had to work the hardest on. English and other subjects came quite naturally to me, but not Maths.

I remember being in year two, Mrs Spencer's class, and being moved down from the top table in Maths because I didn't do very well in my last few tests. I was mortified.

I worked so, so hard to get back onto the top table. So hard that, in fact, Mrs Spencer called in my mum and dad to tell them how impressed she was with me. I remember her saying she was taken aback by my work ethic and my determination to be good and be on top.

I have never liked being told I couldn't do something I wanted to, or believed I could.

The quickest way to get me to do something is to tell me I can't, or you don't think I can.

When I was in second year at college I absolutely bombed my History exam in the January. As it stood, I wasn't going to get into university and be able to study history.

I remember my tutor sitting me down and telling me I'd got an E in my exam. I laughed, nervously, at first and asked him to repeat what he said. I thought I'd heard 'E', but wasn't sure if he said 'A'. To be honest, the A would have been more of a shock!

But I just broke down. I was absolutely crushed. I'd never failed an exam before, and never as spectacularly as that. I knew that if I didn't work hard, I wouldn't be going to university.

So I put the hours in, I did one-to-one revision sessions and worked my arse off to eventually get a B in the exam I'd failed six months previous. And the rest is history, quite literally!

I went to uni and had the best three years ever, making the most amazing memories with the most amazing people.

I can be quite stubborn when I want to be. When I get my mind set on something that I want, whether it be a possession or something I want to do, I don't like to give up on it. I like hard work, I'm not afraid to work my arse off to get what, and where, I want.

This International Women's Day it's important to celebrate the achievements of women all over the world.

We are amazing, strong, powerful human beings who are underestimated every single day. In business, in social situations and in the media. People think women aren't as strong or capable as men because we are more emotional, or more driven by our feelings, but I think that makes us stronger.

Telling a woman she can't do something only spurs her on to want to prove everyone wrong. 

There are so many amazing female role models out there who deserve to be celebrated everyday, not just today.

When women support each other, amazing things happen. Too often in the media women tear each other down, pick faults with each other and are pitted off against each other. But when women come together, we are a force to be reckoned with.

I am so excited to be able to teach my daughter how amazing it is to be a woman, and to let her know that the sky really is her limit. She can do whatever she puts her mind to, and nobody will ever stand in her way if she is determined enough to succeed.

You may also like: Let me share with you my female role models this International Women's Day

To say that children "benefit most" from being raised by a man and a woman is absolute bullshit

Those of you who have read my blog for some time know that I like to give my opinions on current affairs, topics that are being discussed widely at that time, and generally just hop onto my soapbox every now and again.

When I give my opinions, I don't expect everyone to agree with me. The world would be incredibly boring if everyone thought the same thing, and held the same views on things. Debate is healthy, after all.

However, I am always careful to never offend anybody. I am well aware that everyone is entitled to hold their own opinion on things, it's what makes this country, and this world, special that everyone holds their own beliefs on things.

People like Katie Hopkins make me really mad. They have made names for themselves by preaching these controversial points of view and being inappropriate; targeting individuals and preying on them to try and big up their own profiles.

I don't ever read the Daily Mail, I'd just like to put that out there. I occasionally browse Mail Online, but purely for the 'column of shame' (aka the celeb 'gossip'). So this weekend, the only reason I heard about Richard Littlejohn's latest column was because of the news stories about Center Parcs pulling their advertising with the media organisation because of its content.

Littlejohn went on a lengthy rant entitled 'Please don't pretend new dads is the new normal'. He was talking about the news this week that Tom Daley and his husband, Dustin Lance Black, are having a baby.

Just the title alone made me incensed. 

His claims throughout the article made my blood boil, I could physically feel my blood pressure rising as I struggled to comprehend what this man was saying.

He says, and I quote: "I'd rather children were fostered by loving gay couples than condemned to rot in state-run institutions where they face a better-than-average chance of being abused."

He then goes on to say: "That said, and despite the fact that countless single parents do a fantastic job, I still cling to the belief that children benefit most from being brought up by a man and a woman."

He calls the announcement by Tom Daley and his husband and a "publicity stunt" and goes on to question who the baby's mother is. He's concerned that she has been "written out of the script entirely" and is worried that he doesn't know her identity. He assumes she is a surrogate and refers to women bring treated as "mere breeding machines".

He doesn't know her reasons for having this baby for them. Perhaps she fell pregnant and didn't want a termination, so has put the baby up for adoption. She may have had her own children and want to help give other couples that same blessing. There are so many reasons why women carry children for others and that should be applauded, not criticised. They are doing such a brave, incredible thing and giving the best possible gift to a couple whose one dream is to have a child. What exactly is wrong with that?! 

I'm not sure that's really why he is so bothered, though.

Despite Littlejohn saying "No one is suggesting that homosexual couples can't make excellent parents" he queries why the story has been reported everywhere "without so much as a raised eyebrow".

Maybe, just maybe, that's because we live in 2018?

Why do we need to question the parentage of this baby? Tom Daley and Dustin Lance Black clearly want to have this baby, they clearly have enough love to give him/her, and they are obviously more than ready to be parents.

So many babies are brought into this world everyday to parents who aren't ready for them, don't want them, and give them up, or worse, abandon them. What does it matter if this baby doesn't have a male and female bringing them up?

I know some amazing single parents - both men and women - who provide more than enough love to their children. Absent fathers - and mothers, of course - are a regular sight in our society today. But does that mean that children who come from a single-parent home aren't going to do as well? I don't think so.

Single parents are absolutely incredible and I totally admire them bringing up their babies single-handedly. They give so much love and that's all that matters. Some of the brightest kids I know have come from single-parent homes, it genuinely makes no difference who is loving these babies as long as they get enough of it. So to say that children "benefit most" from being raised by a mum and a dad is absolute bullshit.

Why should it matter if Tom Daley's baby has the love of two dads? Love is love, it doesn't matter who or where it comes from. Children all over the world crave love from one, or both, of their parents. They may be in a family with a mum and a dad, but not get the love and affection they need, deserve or want.

It's 2018, for goodness sake, you can't brand things as 'normal' anymore. 

Littlejohn's article goes on to rant about him not agreeing with a transgender woman breastfeeding her baby. He even uses the word her in inverted commas. *Facepalm*

I am pretty certain that Tom Daley's baby is going to be a much kinder, caring, and loving soul than Richard Littlejohn ever could possibly hope to be. Whether that is down to the fact he has been raised by two men, who knows, but I know who I would rather align myself with. And it certainly isn't a bigoted, arrogant man such as Littlejohn.

All the Daily Mail's reaction to this news is remind us that we aren't all equal yet and, despite the amazing work of so many, we all still have so far to go.

Huge congratulations to Tom Daley and Dustin Lance Black on their exciting news.

Why has this series of Love Island been so popular?

Everyone is talking about it, wherever you go.

Offices, bars, the supermarket, the hairdressers... It's the question everyone starts with now, when meeting someone new - do you watch Love Island? The answer is most likely going to be yes, so straight away you've some common ground.

You've issues to discuss like is 'muggy Mike' really deserving of his 'muggy' title? Are Amber and Kem the real deal? Is Gabby really interested in Marcel? And how do we all get an arse like Montana's?

We've been given the date of the final now, with just 12 days to go until series three bows out for another year.

Already I am thinking of starting a Love Island support group, with group chats scheduled for 9pm each evening to help each other through the huge hole that will be left in everyone's lives.

I remember getting hooked on last year's series, and being devastated when it ended, but this year's seems to have been even bigger.

Everyone is talking about it, everyone watches it, and even those who were sceptical and critical of it at first are now obsessed.

But why has this year's series got everyone so hooked?

Is it, perhaps, we are all so fed up with the doom and gloom we constantly hear about and see on the news that we want something light-hearted to enjoy at the end of the day? Maybe we're all just sick of hearing about Brexit and politics and want to lose ourselves in something more easygoing?

I, personally, think the formula just works. Watching relationships develop is interesting. Watching how different personalities and different characters, from different background, interact and get on is fascinating. While there's natural competition as people vie for the attention of the opposite sex, it's not brutal or uncomfortable to watch like other reality TV shows can be.

Finally, reality TV is exciting again. It's getting people talking and it's relatable. The people in there, on the whole, are normal people - students, receptionists, hairdressers... Of course, there's the odd former Blazin' Squad member and Calvin Klein model thrown in for good measure, just to keep it exciting.

The concept is simple - a Big Brother-style house where a load of strangers are stuck together and their every move filmed.

Big Brother has had its day now, I think everyone would agree. It was great when it started, just like The X Factor was, but everyone has got over it now. Geordie Shore and Ex on The Beach have just got too trashy and definitely only appeal to a certain age group or demographic. And TOWIE and MIC have probably also exhausted their concepts.

Love Island, however, is something everyone can watch.

Tom's auntie, who must be in her 70s, is a huge fan of the show. When I learnt this I could've burst with excitement - I can just imagine her sitting down now to watch it having her opinions on all the islanders.

This year's series is literally everywhere now. There are countless stories on Mail Online, The Mirror,  The Sun... This Morning's Holly and Phil are obsessed, Jeremy Corbyn is backing Marcel, and Liam Gallagher admitted to sacking off watching Glastonbury to catch up on Love Island.

Stores have started making Love Island t-shirts with famous quotes from the series emblazoned on the front, you can't log onto any form of social media during 9pm and 10pm without seeing memes galore, and there's no way anyone can receive a text message without announcing it in Love Island fashion.

There aren't any bells and whistles to Love Island, it's simple. Throw in the fact you can watch these relationships forming before your very eyes, whether it be romantic or friendships, and it's just a winning formula.

I feel emotionally invested in all of them now.

I squealed with joy at Jamie and Camilla's cute moments on her birthday, particularly their Dirty Dancing lift; I screamed at Olivia when she was being mean to Chris and made him cry; I clapped when Montana and Alex became boyfriend and girlfriend; and I wanted to hit Jonny repeatedly when he was just being a complete clown.

There are some slightly naughty moments, as you'd expect on a show where couples and relationships are forming, but I definitely don't think we've seen as much sex as last series. Last year, every couple in there did the deed; whereas there have been very few this time who've gone the whole way.

I'm already thinking of starting a petition to hand to ITV for a winter version of the show. I'm thinking at a ski resort, with lots of open fires and hot tubs. I saw Zoella tweeted saying she was pitching Love Iceland, and I could totally get on board with that.

While I am quite unsure what I will obsess over after 24th July, and generally do think I may need to join a support group, I am excited to be able to go to bed early again and not have to worry about missing all the latest gossip and drama from the villa.

You may also like: 24 signs your Love Island obsession has peaked

We cannot continue to ignore our emergency services - they are true heroes

Our emergency service workers are heroes, and it's time people started saying that more.

We've all seen the images from the heartbreaking Grenfell Tower fire, of the firefighters battered, exhausted and heartbroken by what they have endured, seen and come up against. Slumped against walls, trying to catch their breath, unable to comprehend what was going on around them.

We've heard firsthand accounts of the legislations, rules and policies they threw out the window, putting their lives in danger to save others. Stories of firefighters having to write their names on their helmets so they could be easily identified if they died.

We saw images from London recently of police officers throwing themselves in front of terrorists to stop them in their tracks and save lives. Fighting the baddies off with the absolute minimum, hoping to stall them long enough until back-up came. Running into situations head-on, not knowing if they'll be going home to their families at the end of the day.

We've seen doctors, nurses and paramedics rush to the scenes of sheer catastrophe lately. The Manchester bombing, London Bridge, Grenfell Tower, Westminster Bridge - it's been too frequent. These people left their stations, left what they were doing, and rushed to the street to help people in need.

Because, when these people choose a profession in the emergency services and NHS, they do it because they care. They do it to save lives, keep people safe and look after the public. And they do all of those things on a daily basis, with barely any recognition.

They put their safety - and often their own lives - on the line to save others.

They are true heroes.

So why are they not recognised as that? Why, each day, do we glorify others? The term "hero" is banded around far too frequently, yet never deservedly.

I feel this is even more relevant, particularly given some of the atrocious events we have seen in our country recently, but even more so this week.

Earlier this week, MPs voted against Labour's attempts to reverse the long-running freeze on public sector pay.

The pay rate for workers in the public sector has been frozen at just 1 per cent rises since 2010, with the Labour Party tabling an amendment of regret to the Queen's Speech pushing for a pay rise for these heroes.

Tory MPs branded the amendment as a "political game", with one saying that voting for the Labour amendment would usher in either another General Election or a government headed by Jeremy Corbyn.

I'm sorry if I am mistaken, but I thought the amendment was to remove the cap? To allow public sector workers have a pay rise of more than a measly 1 per cent? To show some respect, gratitude and support to those people who work tirelessly every single day. To give a fair and more than deserving pay rise to workers who put their lives on the line every single day.

Tory and DUP MPs came together to vote down the motion by 323 votes to 309.

Wherever your political allegiances lie, this surely can't be defended.

After everything we have seen the past few months, all the praise that has been heaped on the emergency services and the struggling NHS for how they have coped, and this is the thanks they get. Stuck with a pathetic 1 per cent pay rise for the foreseeable future which, let's be honest, after tax/NI probably makes no difference to the wage they take home anyway.

Theresa May doing a meet and greet, and shaking everyone's hand in a line-up, is all well and good. But all this vote shows is that her and her party care more about point-scoring than they do about our emergency services. This was not a game to those workers - this is their lives being played with.

What makes it even worse - if that were possible - is that cheers were heard ringing around the Commons by Tory MPs as the amendment was defeated. They actually cheered.

I am sure - or I would hope - that this was the fact they won in general, rather than what it was they had actually done, but either way it doesn't look good.

It doesn't look good to me, so imagine how it looks to those heroic firefighters who risked everything during the blaze at Grenfell Tower - hearing people cheer at the fact you won't be getting a decent pay rise. Not just a decent pay rise, either, but a well-deserved pay rise.

It makes me so, so angry.

Wherever your political allegiances lie, surely you must be able to see that this is not right? It's not right how Theresa can't locate her magic money tree for nurses, junior doctors, firefighters... But as soon as her minority government needs propping up, she stumbles across a whole money forest and can scramble together over £1 billion for Northern Ireland.

During the recent election campaign, Theresa May was even quoted saying to a woman: "I'm being honest with you in terms of saying that we will put more money into the NHS, but there isn't a magic money tree that we can shake that suddenly provides for everything that people want."

The whole state of affairs makes me feel sick.

I don't often like to get political on my blog - preferring to talk syn free recipes, farting and Love Island - but this cannot be ignored.

We cannot continue to ignore our emergency services in this way. To do so may mean that one day, when we really, really need them, their resources have become so stretched that they're nowhere to be found.

24 signs your Love Island obsession has peaked

There are two types of people in this world - those who watch Love Island, and those who pretend they don't watch Love Island.

It's the Balearic-based reality TV programme that has taken over the nation.

Camilla has won everyone's hearts, Jonny is public enemy number one, and we now all know the name of at least one member of Blazin' Squad.

Here's 24 signs you're obsessed with Love Island (not that you probably needed that confirming!)

1. You spend your entire day counting down until 9pm.
Eat, Love Island, sleep, repeat.

2. Saturday is suddenly the worst night of the week.
Because, yeah it's nice to leave the house, but 47 hours is too long to wait to get our latest fix of Villa action.

3. You're slowly but surely following all the islanders on every social media platform.
Until they start plugging charcoal toothpaste, cleansing teas and hair thickening tablets, then they'll be unfollowed quicker than two celebs during a break-up.

4. You showed more interest in Jonny and Camilla's romance than your own love life.
We were all rooting for you, Jamilla.

5. Your life was instantly made when discovering you can now buy the Love Island water bottles.
FINALLY!!! For those who haven't yet discovered this, simply download the Love Island app and visit the shop on there.

6. The Love Island app is life.
Polls, previews, pics from the islanders phones - it's every fan's dream.

7. You cried when Camilla cried.
We love you, Camilla.

8. You can't listen to Amber talking about "her type on paper" or putting her eggs into baskets anymore.
Her notebook and egg baskets must be huge!

9. You've had debates in the office over whether Mike was muggy or magic.
His face just screams "muggy".

10. You've thought, at length, about who you'd couple up with if you were in the villa.
And changed your mind every time one of them has acted like a spoon. Except Marcel. He's a God.

11. You're heartbroken to learn we're at the halfway point of the series.
What will life be like A.L.I (after Love Island)?!?!

12. If by some catastrophe you've missed an episode you've experienced the agonising wait of ITV Hub uploading the episode.
Seriously, how can Emmerdale be uploaded within minutes of it finishing and Love Island take hours?!

13. You firmly believe that had Dom really liked/loved Jess, he would have walked.
Because what's the point in staying in Love Island if you ain't looking? As they all say, it's not Friend Island.

14. You talk about the islanders like you actually know them personally.
"Yeah, I really think Kem should just sack Amber off, he can do so much better."

15. You've upped our workout routine after seeing their bodies.
Seriously, though, how good is Montana's arse?

16. Dick sand actually makes sense to you.
Let's be honest, girls, we've all been there.

17. As soon as the episode finishes you de-brief in your WhatsApp groups.
Usually expressing your excitement at tomorrow's episode. 

18. You've considered playing 'The Love Island drinking game'
But aren't quite sure that you'd like to die just yet.

19. You have to resist the urge to shout "I'VE GOT A TEXT" when your phone goes.
Even if it's not a text.

20. You want Camilla to couple up with herself and win.
She's a strong, independent woman who don't need no man!

21. You're always jealous of Montana's snack game.
The girl is always eating, I love her.

22. The fact episodes are now longer than an hour is the best thing that happened since series three graced our screens.
It almost makes up for no episode on a Saturday. Almost...

23. The only thing you're looking forward to about Love Island finishing is going to bed earlier.
It's sad, but it's true.

You may also like: Camilla asked the perfect question on last night's Love Island - shouldn't we all be feminists?

Camilla asked the perfect question on last night's Love Island - shouldn't we all be feminists?

Of all the topics I expected to be discussed on Love Island, feminism is not one of them.

I expected conversations about plastic surgery, sex, the best way to contour, hair removal, how to execute the perfect squat, more sex...

But last night's episode caught me by surprise.

When I saw the preview, and saw Camilla crying because she found out something about Jonny that she didn't like, I never thought it would be that.

As the pair, who seemed to be embarking on a blossoming romance, entered into a conversation in the kitchen the topic quickly shifted to feminism, equality and women's rights.

It all stemmed from whether or not Jonny would pay on a date. He said he would feel emasculated if a woman paid, and wouldn't even entertain going halves. Camilla, on the other hand, said she felt it fair a woman also pay her way and wouldn't like being paid for all the time.

Soon, the pair were in a heated debate about equality between men and women.

Jonny maintained that women were far more equal in today's society than they had ever been, even throwing in a bit of topical politics by stating, quite rightly, that the Prime Minister is a woman.

However, Camilla said the whole problem was that Jonny didn't think there was still a gender gap in terms of jobs, pay, and equality of the sexes. When, quite clearly, there is.

Their conversation ended in tears, with Camilla getting quite upset that she had kissed someone before knowing their beliefs on an issue so important to her.

Hats off to the girl for having such an admirable moral code, I've kissed guys before and not even known their name!

She took a lot of stick on social media for getting so upset, for reacting the way she did, and for raising the issue at all. But it's so important that she did.

Not everyone is going to share the same views, that's the beauty of the world that we live in - everyone is entitled to have a different opinion on things.

When Jonny asked Camilla if she was a feminist she had the best reply ever, asking: "Shouldn't we all be?"

Yes girl!

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Everyone should care about women's rights, whether you're a woman or not. Being a feminist shouldn't be a bad thing. It shouldn't be a derogatory term, or a taboo subject.

Someone who cares so passionately about equality is the kind of person who should be celebrated online. It's an important subject which has now been raised in front of a brand new audience, some of whom have probably never even considered it as an issue in today's society.

As topics of conversation go on Love Island, I think this is probably the most important.

Closely followed in second, of course, by Marcel being in Blazin Squad.

I accept Jonny's argument that there isn't the huge gap that there used to be, the UK has come a long way in ensuring women are on more of a level playing field. But to say, just because the PM is a woman, that there aren't equal rights between men and women is not right.

Camilla's job in the real world means she will see huge inequalities between men and women all around the world. There are societies where women have no role to play except feeding and caring for their man and their family. They're deprived of an education, of a career and of a voice.

We are no way in that situation in this country, thankfully, but Camilla's argument wasn't just about women in this country - it's a global problem that needs to be addressed.

And I salute her for standing up for her beliefs and not just dropping her knickers for the first guy who showed an interest in her. Her integrity, her beliefs and her kind heart make her my favourite girl  by far in the villa.



I really, really hope the producers can find the perfect man for her because the early days between her and Jonny were just my favourite. Her little eyes twinkling and lighting up - she needs that again!

I do concede, though, she is probably in the wrong place if she wants to meet a guy who shares her views on the topic of feminism, gender equality and is willing to enter into an educational discussion. Which makes me very sad.

Jonny was the closest guy currently in there to ticking the boxes, and probably even understood what it all meant, let alone would enter into a debate about it. I can't imagine many of the other guys who are in there, or are lined up to enter, would even get drawn into such conversations.

I really hope, though, that a guy watching resonated with what she said and sent off his application to the Love Island producers, because that's the kind of romance I want to watch blossom on my screen.

It's wrong to call this election result "the revenge of the young"

I try not to blog too much about politics, purely because I don't want to open up a huge debate and for people to bicker all over my posts.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinions, on everything in life, and we all have to accept that we aren't all going to agree. Imagine what a boring world it would be if we did?

Everyone has different priorities, different outlooks, different circumstances and different experiences. It's ok not to agree on everything. You may not agree with what I write, but that's ok.

When I have addressed politics previously, it's been with regards to turnout - particularly encouraging younger people to exercise their right to vote.

The first election I could vote in, back in 2010, was so exciting for me. I couldn't wait to go to the polling station and put my cross in the box. I even kept my polling card, in one of my many memory boxes, to remember the moment. It was a big deal to me.

But it's not the same for everyone.

In 2010, just 44% of those aged 18 to 24 turned out to cast their vote; compared to 55% of aged 25 to 35.

In stark comparison, 76% of those aged over 65 turned out to vote.

In 2015, it was even less.

43% of those aged 18 to 24 exercised their right to vote, with 54% aged 25 to 34.

Again, those aged 65 and over had the highest turnout with 78%.

It's staggering, how disengaged young people have become with politics.

That is, until this election. Early indicators show a turnout of around 72% of those aged 18 to 24 in yesterday's General Election. This hasn't been confirmed yet, and won't be until next week, but these early estimates are incredible.

Sky News estimated the turnout among 18 to 24 years olds was around 66%. Even if this figure is true, it's still a substantial increase on the figures seen in the last election.

It literally makes me so sad when I see so few young people turning out to vote. And I don't understand why.

Not everyone understands politics, I get that, but everyone should care. These people, whether you like them or not, dictate the future of our country. Everyone is quick to complain when they can't get an appointment with their doctor for two weeks. I looked the other day, and had to wait 14 days to see a GP at my surgery. I'm pretty sure, what is wrong with me, would have either gone, got a whole lot worse, or killed me in that time. It's no wonder A&E departments are overrun at hospitals.

More than 600,000 people registered to vote in the final 24 hours - around two-thirds of those were aged between 18 and 34.

Some have called this election result "the revenge of the young", but the word revenge is wrong for this. It's not revenge. It's finally standing up to be heard. Having enough of politicians ignoring our voice and speaking out for our own future. Getting tired with newspapers pedalling propaganda, fake news and pushing the ideologies of whoever they have chosen to side with this week. Ignoring commissioned polls, expectation and what we're told is reality.

Even the eve of the election, newspapers and news outlets were predicting Theresa May to win by a bigger majority than Margaret Thatcher. Corbyn's entire campaign, manifesto and role as leader was undermined the whole way through the campaign.

None of the party leaders, apart from Jeremy Corbyn, engaged with young people at all during the short-lived election campaign.

Corbyn was the one pushing for young people to register to vote, Corbyn was the one targeting the younger audience with his policies and his campaign, and Corbyn was the one who motivated the younger age bracket to turn out in such high numbers.

Regardless of whether or not these young votes converted into votes for Corbyn, he is one of the main reasons why so many turned out in the first place. And that can only be a good thing.

I only hope that this momentum keeps going, with more young people continuing to exercise their right to vote, to turn out at elections and have their say on the policies that will shape our future.

It is still unclear how the results of yesterday's election will play out. I only hope that, whenever the next election comes around, young people do their bit again and stand up to be heard.

If turnout really does end up being as high as initial indicators suggest, British politics could change forever.

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We need more love in the world, not less

Poor David Beckham.

That's not a phrase I thought I'd ever use - he's got a stunning wife, gorgeous kids, good health, never has to work another day in his life... He's got it pretty easy really.

But, last week, the DILF sparked debate/controversy/whatever other stupid word you want to use after posting a photo of him kissing his five-year-old little girl.

Here is said image:

I saw it and thought how cute it was. That beautiful bond between father and daughter. A show of affection, a lovely moment to cherish from their holiday, and a symbol of unconditional love.

Unfortunately not everybody is of the same opinion as me.

Those absolute delights on social media, who crawl out of the woodwork ready to slam even the most innocent and special of things, branded Beckham's kiss with Harper as "weird" and "wrong". A similar photo posted by Victoria Beckham for Harper's birthday last year received the same criticism.

WHY?

If you ask me, it's more weird and wrong to not kiss your children, especially young children, on the lips. If the Beckhams want to kiss Harper on the lips then so be it. At the end of the day, she's five - a child!

My mum and dad used to kiss me on the lips all the time when I was really small and, I know, when Tom and I eventually have children, I will kiss them on the lips too.

Some of the comments have asked "what the world is coming to" by him kissing his baby girl on the lips.

I'm sorry, but I'd have to ask what the world was coming to if a father didn't want to kiss his little girl on the lips. She is five-years-old for God's sake!

Someone else said it looked like they were "making out" while others branded it "old fashioned".

Maybe, just maybe, people not showing this kind of affection to their children anymore is what is actually "wrong" with the world. Parents kissing their children is completely and utterly normal - or at least it should be.

A kiss between a parent and a child is a sign of unconditional love.

We need more love in the world, not less. We need more parents kissing their children, more shows of affection and more kindness.

With all the horrible things we see on the news everyday, all the mindless acts of terrorism and hatred around the world, surely acts of love - like David Beckham's picture - should be celebrated and not slammed.

Imagine how much nicer the world would be to live in if everyone was just kind to each other.

Coronation Street need to be praised for their grooming storyline, not criticised.

I'm an avid fan of Coronation Street, I have been for as long as I can remember. To the point where, when we used to go on holiday, mum and dad used to set up several VHS recorders and blank tapes to record every episode while we were away.

I even went on the Corrie tour a few years ago when it opened on the old set - best. day. out. ever.

One of the biggest, 'controversial' storylines I can remember from watching it as a child was Sarah-Lou's teenage pregnancy.

Now, 17 years later, and Sarah's daughter, Bethany, is involved in, arguably, the soap's most controversial storyline to date.

Yet, while it's the most controversial, it's probably the most important. The most important that any soap has ever covered in its history, I would go as far to say.

For those who don't watch the soap, or follow it in the news, Bethany has been the centre of a grooming storyline which has been slowly burning since before Christmas.

She was picked up by Nathan and has been groomed by him since, with him selling her for sex with his sick, older friends.

Last night's show was the most shocking to date, with three of his friends handing over cash to him before heading into a room where she was gang raped.

This morning, I've seen stories online saying that it's inappropriate and irresponsible of Corrie to show the details of Bethany's story and that they've gone too far in showing the dark scenes.

There have also been a number of complaints to Ofcom about it, which I find totally and completely ridiculous.

Child sexual exploitation and child grooming is a massive, massive issue at the moment. It is happening, far too widely, across the country and people are too afraid to speak out about it. It's a taboo subject, and it shouldn't be.

Corrie bosses bravely took the decision to tell this story and I highly commend them for highlighting the issue.

Those who are being groomed, or are victims of child sexual exploitation, don't realise what is happening to them is abuse. They've been brainwashed and manipulated in such a way that they think it's normal, they think it's loving, and they think it's okay.

Yes, the scenes on Corrie are uncomfortable to watch, but what makes it even more uncomfortable is realising that this is happening all over the country. There are teenage girls who are victims of this kind of abuse enduring far worse than we are being exposed to on our television screens.

It's so, so important that Coronation Street tackle this issue and bring it to people's attention. If it can just resonate with one girl that the same is happening to her, and it isn't okay, then it has achieved what it set out to do.

Those who are reporting the grooming storyline to Ofcom are, in my view, being quite irresponsible.

One person tweeted "@itvcorrie how can you broadcast this storyline in this much detail @Ofcom please help our children watching this!!!! #coronationstreet"

That's the exact reason it needs to be broadcast in the way it has, to make children realise that it is not okay and it is not normal. There haven't been any graphic scenes, nor have we seen any incidents of actual gang rape. Last night's episode ended with three men entering the room with Bethany before closing the door. The camera stayed on the door for, slowly zooming out before rolling the titles.

Nothing was actually shown, and it didn't need to be. We all knew what was happening.

It was broadcast after the watershed, too, so in theory, they could have shown more graphic scenes. But it doesn't need to. Leaving it for us to imagine the disgusting abuse makes it worse than they could ever portray.

It's so important that Coronation Street is raising awareness in this way, highlighting the fact that there are sick individuals who target young girls in this way and, more importantly, that there are so many girls who are victims of this.

I understand parents wanting to protect children from the harsh realities of the world, nobody wants their kids to see all the horrible things that are going on, but we can't wrap them in cotton wool and shy them away from reality. Them not being aware of things like this makes it unlikely they would spot it if it were happening to a friend, someone they knew, or even themselves.

Coronation Street have handled the whole storyline in such an excellent way, so that it isn't too graphic or dark for children to watch in the usual 7.30pm slot, and for that they need to be praised, not criticised.

Lucy Fallon, who plays Bethany, has also played the character incredibly. She deserves all the awards and praise for this. I've read lots of interviews with her, too, where she has spoken with victims and survivors of abuse - and that is incredibly telling from the way she is portraying the character.

By raising awareness, the hope is it will encourage victims to speak out and put an end to the abuse they are enduring. And that can only be a good thing.

For free confidential support and advice, 24 hours a day, call Childline on 0800 1111. You can also visit their website by following this link.

High street stores should do more to make women feel body confident

A story on Mail Online really struck a chord with me yesterday.

No, not the one about the American strippers who had to call their show quits early because they all got diarrhoea and shit all over the stage - one slightly closer to home.

A girl had been to H&M and struggled to find a dress that was true to size and fit her slender, size 12 frame.

Lowri Byrne posted images online of the pretty blue dress blasting the high street store for its insane sizing of clothes. She said she could barely breathe in the size 16 and asked the shop assistant if they had an 18, which they didn't.

I have had exactly the same experience, and it left me feeling so incredibly downcast and despondent about myself.

It was back in 2014, when I was shopping for an upcoming holiday. I worked in York at the time and nipped to H&M on my dinner to pick up some shorts, dresses and bikinis for my holiday.

I wasn't feeling massively body confident, but I was still wearing size 10/12 clothes which fit my well. I picked out some shorts I liked, and a couple of dresses, and headed to the changing room.

I tried on the size 10 shorts and I couldn't get them above my knees. I knew starting with the 10s was an optimistic move, but to not even be able to get them over my knees hit me hard.

Onto the 12s and I had the same problem.

I went back onto the shop floor and got a pair of size 14s. These went up to my thighs but no higher.

Out again I went and got a size 16. These came up to my bum but would never have fastened. By this point, I was stress sweating like there was no tomorrow.

Remember the scene in Friends, where Ross can't get his leather trousers back up after going to the toilet and he gets all sweaty and makes it worse? Yep, that was me in the changing rooms of H&M on that May dinner time.

I gave up then, I wanted the changing room floor to open up and swallow me whole. I just couldn't believe it. How could the trousers I was wearing that day to work be a size 10, and I couldn't even fit into a pair of size 16 shorts?!

From then on, I have very rarely bought anything from H&M.

Their sizing guides are insanely small and give me the biggest body worries ever. And what girl needs any more anxiety or hang-ups about their body? I'm pretty sure we've all got enough of those!

A few weeks after the horrific H&M incident I braved holiday shopping again. I had just about recovered from the harrowing experience.

I went to Miss Selfridge and got myself two pairs of high waisted shorts, both of which were a size 12 and fit me perfectly.

In fact, the photo actually came up on my Timehop the other day after I gleefully took a changing room selfie and slapped it straight onto Instagram.

I was no Victoria's Secret model, but hell I was definitely slimmer than the H&M sizes made me feel.

I know it shouldn't matter what the label in our clothes say, nobody else can see that. If we feel good, and look good, that's all that should matter. But high street shops, in particular H&M, could really do more to help us along the way with this.

I must stress, it's not just H&M I have had this issue with.

I once bought the exact same dress, in two different colours, from Primark because I liked it so much. One was grey, one was burgundy. Both were a size 10.

The grey one fit like a glove, it was perfect. The burgundy one was so much tighter and, when I lay them on top of one another, could see it was noticeably smaller. My mum has also had the same thing with jeans from Primark.

Come on, high street stores, start making your sizing more realistic and uniformed, and stick to those sizings.

When you order a foot-long sub from Subway, it's always a foot-long. Never a foot and a few inches, or a few inches short of a foot. So why should a size 10 dress in one place, be a size 16 in another?

The heartbreaking attack in Manchester reminds us that hate will not win

The news coming out of Manchester today is absolutely heartbreaking.

As I read the various online articles, tweets and social media posts, my heart hurts for the families of those affected by this awful, awful act of terror.

As we were going to bed last night I saw early reports online of explosions heard at Manchester Arena at the end of an Ariana Grande concert. I saw various reports - everything from a speaker blowing to a bomb.

When I woke up this morning and saw the news, I couldn't believe it. I asked myself, once again, what kind of world do we live in?

As soon as I saw it had been at an Ariana Grande concert I knew it would be mainly children and teenagers in attendance. What possesses anyone to want to target young, innocent people?

For many of these children it will have been their first concert experience. Some will have been waiting for this concert for months - the tickets will have been Christmas or birthday presents. They'll have got all dressed up after school, probably gone out for a nice tea beforehand, as the excitement for the evening built.

Many of the youngsters in there will have been without parents. I know when I was younger, and I started showing more of an interest in going to concerts, mum and dad used to drop me and my friends off outside, decide on a meeting point for afterwards, and pick us up when it finished.

The last time I was at Manchester Arena was when I was 17, to see Miley Cyrus. My mum and dad dropped me and my friend outside as the doors opened, they went off to the cinema and for some food, then met us back outside afterwards.

For so many of the kids inside Manchester Arena last night, this will have been the same.

These kids will have been taking selfies, videos, and pictures galore to share with their friends on social media and at school the next day; ready to make everyone jealous that they'd seen Ariana Grande. It's such a shame it had to end in the way it did.

They'll have all had plans for the rest of the week, the summer, the rest of their lives. Some will have been looking forward to a holiday, or another concert later in the year, or had plans for the upcoming bank holiday weekend.

Not even a pop concert filled with kids is safe. And the fact this coward has used the fact the arena will be filled with children to maximise the impact of this disgusting attack is even worse.

Terrorism will have been the last thing on their minds, just like it's the last thing on most people's minds as we all go about our day-to-day lives.

Those people walking along Westminster Bridge in March won't have expected a terrorist to strike, neither did the holidaymakers enjoying the sun in Tunisia in 2015.

At present, the death toll for last night's explosion stands at 22 - with 59 injured. This is, I'm sure, bound to rise as the day goes on. The news is reporting this morning that parents are still looking for their children who were inside the concert last night. Kids as young as six years old, who got split up from their parents during the stampede. How can that even be comprehended?!

What an agonising 12 hours it must have been, and continues to be, for them. I hope and pray that every child missing is safe, well and being cared for until they are reunited with their parents. I cannot imagine the pain, anguish and heartbreak they are experiencing right now.

Looking on Facebook and Twitter this morning has been heartbreaking. I've seen countless posts being shared - parents looking for missing children, children looking for missing parents - it's difficult to comprehend this is all going on just an hour and a bit down the M62.

But what social media has also shown me this morning, is that terrorism will not win. These cowardly terrorists will never squash or eradicate love. It's times like this we need to stand strong, united and show that they will never win.

I've seen people offering space in their cars to take kids home, people offering beds for the night, hotels taking in lost children to keep them safe - it's always the worst times when the best people shine.

Those who are planning to go to concerts in the coming weeks - go and enjoy yourselves. Keep going to concerts, keep going shopping, keep going to the theatre. Keep living your life, keep loving and caring, and cherish every moment. Hate will not win.